Thanksgiving marks a season of reflection, yet gratitude isn’t always easy to come by—especially after an election year, when cognitive overload and societal stress dominate our attention. This isn’t just a personal struggle; neuroscience suggests our brains are wired to focus on negativity, a phenomenon called negativity bias. This tendency, coupled with cultural norms emphasizing individual success and the relentless comparisons driven by social media, makes practicing gratitude a skill we must consciously develop.
In my work as a coach and host of Taste of Truth Tuesdays, I often explore how habits—like fitness, nutrition, or mindfulness—shape not just our bodies, but our minds. Gratitude operates the same way: it’s not a passive feeling, but an active practice. According to Dr. Monica Johnson, gratitude has the power to rewire your brain, reducing stress and boosting resilience. Here’s why it can be so hard—and how you can overcome those challenges.
Why Gratitude Feels So Hard
- 1. Negativity Bias
Our brains are wired to prioritize threats and negative experiences over positive ones. This evolutionary survival mechanism can make it harder to notice or appreciate the good in our lives.
- 2. High Expectations and Comparisons
Social media amplifies the pressure to compare our lives to others, often creating unrealistic standards. When our focus shifts to what we lack, gratitude takes a backseat.
- 3. Cognitive Overload and Stress
Life moves fast, and our schedules are packed. Reflecting on what we’re thankful for requires slowing down—a luxury stress and busyness don’t easily allow.
- 4. Cultural and Social Conditioning
In cultures that prize personal achievement and material success, gratitude can feel secondary. Celebrating milestones and accomplishments may overshadow smaller, everyday joys.
- 5. Mental Health Challenges
Depression, anxiety, and trauma can make it difficult to recognize and appreciate the positives in life. These conditions often shift focus to worries, fears, or a sense of helplessness.
- 6. Entitlement Mindset
When we feel entitled to certain comforts or successes, it diminishes our ability to see them as gifts, fostering dissatisfaction instead of gratitude.
- 7. Lack of Practice
Gratitude is a skill, not just an attitude. Without consistent effort, it’s easy for this muscle to weaken.
The Science of Gratitude: Three Proven Strategies
Fortunately, research provides powerful tools to strengthen gratitude. These practices are straightforward, effective, and supported by science.
1. Gratitude Journaling
One of the simplest and most effective methods is keeping a gratitude journal. Regularly writing down three to five things you’re thankful for has been shown to boost emotional well-being and reduce stress.
As a gardener and homesteader, I’ve found parallels here: journaling is like planting seeds of positivity. With time, those seeds grow into a garden of resilience and contentment.
Why it works:
A study by Dr. Robert Emmons, a leading researcher on gratitude, found that journaling helps rewire the brain by reinforcing positive experiences. This practice shifts focus away from what’s missing in your life toward what’s already there.
How to do it:
- Spend five minutes each evening listing specific things you’re grateful for.
- Be detailed—rather than “I’m grateful for my family,” write, “I’m grateful for the family dinner we had tonight where everyone laughed together.”
2. Gratitude Letters or Visits
Writing a heartfelt letter to someone who has positively impacted your life is another effective practice. Even better? Deliver the letter in person or send it to them.
Why it works:
Research highlighted by Dr. Monica Johnson of The Savvy Psychologist shows that thanking someone you’ve never properly appreciated increases happiness immediately and for up to a month afterward. The act deepens relationships and reinforces a sense of connection.
How to do it:
- Reflect on someone who has helped or supported you in a meaningful way.
- Write a sincere letter describing what they did and why it mattered.
- Deliver it, either in person, through a video call, or via mail.
For me, this practice reminds me of the people who’ve supported my journey—from launching my podcast to building a small homestead.
3. Mental Subtraction of Positive Events
Instead of focusing on what you’re grateful for, imagine your life without certain positive aspects. This “mental subtraction” technique can powerfully enhance your appreciation for what you have.
Why it works:
A study published in the Journal of Positive Psychology revealed that imagining life without key blessings intensifies gratitude by showing how much worse life could be. This perspective shift cultivates appreciation even for things we take for granted.
How to do it:
- Think about a cherished relationship, opportunity, or moment in your life.
- Reflect on how your life would be without it.
- Let this realization deepen your gratitude for that aspect of your life.
I often reflect on what life would be like without the small joys I’ve cultivated—like watching our garden grow or exploring life with my 3 dogs. It’s a powerful way to deepen appreciation for the present.
Gratitude is a Skill Worth Building
Gratitude might not come naturally, but with consistent practice, it can become a cornerstone of emotional resilience and happiness. By journaling, expressing thanks to others, and practicing mental subtraction, you can train your brain to focus on the good—even amidst life’s challenges.
Gratitude isn’t just a feel-good emotion—it’s a powerful mental tool that rewires your brain for better health and happiness. Through neuroplasticity, gratitude practices such as journaling or simply expressing thanks, strengthen neural pathways linked to positive emotions and weaken those associated with stress or negativity. This results in reduced anxiety, lower cortisol (the stress hormone), and improved mood
But the benefits don’t stop at mental health. Gratitude is also linked to better heart health, stronger immune function, and improved sleep quality. By calming the nervous system, gratitude promotes relaxation and a sense of well-being. Plus, it enhances emotional intelligence, fostering empathy, compassion, and stronger social connections
As Dr. Monica Johnson reminds us, gratitude is like a muscle: it grows stronger the more you use it. This Thanksgiving, and in the year ahead, let’s commit to cultivating gratitude as a daily habit. The rewards—a brighter perspective, deeper connections, and greater joy—are well worth the effort.
Gratitude isn’t about ignoring pain or hardship—it’s about recognizing the value in the journey. Whether you’re navigating personal struggles, cultural pressures, or simply a stressful holiday season, gratitude offers a way to stay curious, grounded, and resilient.
For more information on the 365 Easy Challenge for 2025, click here!
Which gratitude strategy will you try first? Let me know in the comments!
For a deeper exploration of the science of gratitude, you can check out these insightful resources:
Books:
- The Gratitude Diaries by Janice Kaplan – This book blends personal storytelling with scientific research on the power of gratitude in transforming daily life.
- Thanks! How the New Science of Gratitude Can Make You Happier by Robert Emmons – Emmons, one of the leading researchers in the field, explores the science behind gratitude and how practicing it can improve physical and mental health.
- The Happiness Advantage by Shawn Achor – Achor discusses how happiness, including gratitude, can lead to success in work and life by creating a positive mindset.
Studies and Articles:
- Gratitude and Well-being (Greater Good Science Center) – A collection of studies demonstrating that gratitude can improve overall well-being, reduce stress, and enhance relationshipsGreater Good.
- A study published in Psychology of Well-Being found that practicing gratitude regularly can help reduce negative emotions and promote a greater sense of life satisfactionGreater Good.
TED Talks:
- “The Power of Vulnerability” by Brené Brown – Brown explores how embracing vulnerability, along with gratitude, leads to a deeper connection with others and personal well-being.
- “What’s So Funny About Gratitude?” by Robyn Stratton-Berkessel – In this talk, Stratton-Berkessel discusses the profound impact that asking about positive experiences can have on fostering gratitude in everyday life PositivePsychology.com.
- “The Secret to Happiness is Helping Others” by Mike Robbins – Robbins highlights how gratitude, especially when expressed towards others, can create a ripple effect of kindness and well-beingPositivePsychology.com.
These resources provide a rich blend of personal, scientific, and practical perspectives on how gratitude can enhance our lives.
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